If Being Peaceful Means I’m Crazy, Then By All Means…Put Me In A Straightjacket

 

There are many times in my day to day life where, unspoken or not, my ideas and passions give me looks and comments and backhanded sentences that all add up to the same sentiment: You’re Crazy. Some days that’s hard to deal with and makes me feel like I’m a small peaceful bacteria in an ocean of some cannibalistic species. Some days it makes me angry and lights a fire under me and makes me more determined to do what I said I was going to do in the first place, just to say I did it and it’s not impossible. Sometimes it makes me laugh and sometimes it makes me cry. Sometimes it makes me wake up first thing in the morning and write blog posts.

But let me tell you what, folks.

In this case and instance and time, being and choosing Peace does not make me crazy.

The night before last I saw on facebook all kinds of things about the awful results of the Ferguson case. I knew there would be rage and riots and protests. It hurt my heart a little bit. A lotta bit…I think my boyfriend kind of took it as a given like “Welp, here we go again” and went about his business because at the end of the day you can’t stop people from being people. So while I felt the pain of tons of people and tried to work that out in myself, he did his own thing. No discussion was to be had because, I suppose for him, there didn’t need to be. And I honestly miss that part of him because he and I met during Occupy. When we both marched the streets and slept in tents and fought for something. But things happened along the way and whereas he became disenchanted with the whole process of discussions, action, and results in its many forms, I have managed to keep a teeeeeny tiny tea candle of a flame lit somewhere deep in my belly and I’ve managed to come out the other side with this idea for a long term goal for a small patch of Peace in Greensboro called the GSO Compassion Mission.

And so yesterday morning as I drove to work (because nobody can really get out of work or school without consequences for these types of things), I saw some blue lights. I wondered what was going on, but then I saw that there was a police officer patrolling and I guess keeping an eye on things as a very large crowd of people were gathering at a church. And more were walking up the road to get to the church to protest. ** correction, they weren’t in the parking lot to protest, they were in line to get a Free Thanksgiving Meal from the church: http://www.wfmynews2.com/story/news/local/2014/11/25/feeding-the-5000-thanksgiving-meals-feeding-the-5000/70078604/ **

And so I reached in my folder of many documents and pulled out some outreach fliers for #Compassion and posted them up on campus. It was my effort of hopefully lighting a small candle in somebody else that when the world is screaming for justice, there’s somebody whispering “compassion”. And sometimes that’s all that needs to be said.

No I’m not saying that the cop was right and the kid was wrong. Or the kid was right and the cop was wrong. Or that all people of color are this and all white people are that. Or that cops as a whole are this and everybody else is something else. I’m not saying any of that. At all. I’m just saying that as a whole society, town, world, what have you…there’s a level of compassion that needs to be felt. An effort to understand and to work and to dig out of misunderstanding in an even harder effort to understand. If people (as in human beings of all sizes, shapes, genders, abilities, disabilities, and faiths) make a concentrated effort to understand each other–or even to sit and yell it out a bit with the end goal to being understanding–then things can and should work out to be better. Just. Better. If any of us get to see this concept in our lifetimes played out on a larger scale than the one time “stories for good” where a cop pays for a lady’s groceries and we forget about it, then we’ll finally understand this compassion concept. This concept of Peace.

And so that’s why I’m working on at least building some capital on the way to building the GSO Compassion Mission. It’s so there can be an avenue to sit and build and be peace. Discuss. Learn. Grow. Heal. Take in some light and spread it around and make a change in yourself, your neighbor, your neighborhood, your community, your city, your world. That’s just what I believe in in my core as I type away furiously scanning spreadsheets and crunching numbers at my 40hr a week job. As I try my damndest to maximize my potential in this world even though other people think that’s too much effort and maybe I should just take a nap and call it a day (which I kind of did lastnight and I kind of regret it now). As I look at or hear videos of people bombing each other or fighting in the street. I feel the need for peace. I believe in Peace. And in some people’s eyes, even the one’s closest to me, that makes me crazy. So by all means:

If Being Peaceful Means I’m Crazy, Then By All Means…Put Me In A Straightjacket.

Creating a Legacy: Community Building

Creating a legacy can be hard. I’m pretty sure it’s not the easiest thing to do, especially nowadays. I’ve been reading these books on being founder of a nonprofit, nonprofit management, entrepreneurship, all while working legitimately 40 hour weeks, waking up early to do things I don’t have time for during the day and making awfully poor attempts at staying up late to spend time with my night-owl boyfriend. All the meanwhile, thinking of how to do outreach single handedly and make my presence more known on twitter and/or facebook while thinking about ways to promote and release my baking/blog store (www.thespatteredspatula.com) in early 2015. It’s all part of actively building a future. Actively building a legacy. Not just for me, but for my boyfriend, my mom, my friend in Lexington who just recently lost her brother, for my grandmother who passed away not too soon after I graduated high school, for my deep thinking friend who committed suicide many years ago and for my extended family member’s wife who met a similar fate. She valued education and doing what you want to do in life, her eyes were so bright bright her heart was dark…and this is all for them. The GSO Compassion Mission is all for them.

But I’m 27 years old, trying to build a future, clean up the past and live in the present and it’s difficult! It’s really difficult. It’s really hard. But it’s not impossible. I hardly think that it’s ever impossible.

My grandmother seemed to be a great and passionate entrepreneur. And it’s times like these that I definitely wish that she were around to see what I’m working on. To help out with some crazy schemes and promotion. To tell me that this is good work that I’m doing. I’m sure she see’s it all the time now. My mother is an educator in many ways and now she kind of goes from day to day kind of doing what she needs to do, while trying to do what she enjoys, but I don’t think it’s everything that she wants.

And so now, here I am at 5:50 in the morning, updating a blog and watching Sons of Anarchy since I fell asleep lastnight on the couch again and couldn’t watch the show with my boyfriend. And here I am thinking about how to build a legacy while I’m alive. A lot of things get expedited when you’re gone, unfortunately. It takes a lot of work in order to do the same work when you’re here. And that’s what I’m trying to do. It doesn’t make a lot of sense to a lot of people. There are other projects going on in town, people are collaborating and working on other things and can’t think about what will happen in a year, 3 years, 5 years, or even 8 years when (ideally, fingers crossed) the house is unveiled.

The GSO Compassion Mission needs a lot of hearts and hands on it, a lot of boots on the ground, a lot of funds and collaborations and connections in a lot of different places. It can’t be done alone. It has to be done together. So that my legacy becomes a whole lot more.

Collaboration part one: Summerfield Farms

Yesterday I went to Summerfield Farms in Summerfield, NC for their customer appreciation day. It was my first stop at Summerfield Farms, but I’ve driven by there from time to time in the past. Upon doing some research, I realized that Summerfield Farms (or anybody connected to it), would be a great partner, connection and resource to have. But first I have to figure out how to get to that partner/connection/resource.

The land itself is 500 acres. They grow their own farm fresh food, fruits and vegetables, they have their own livestock, and they even hold weddings from time to time! It’s a very multi-functional place and that’s why I feel like I have a lot to learn from them. If I can find the right connections. However, they wouldn’t let me leave my business cards, so I’m not sure that any of them know I exist in that manner, lol. Oh well. That’s what email’s for, right? So we’ll see.

So I wandered around the front area for a little while when they first started the day and took a few pictures. I eventually went home once I got a few items and took a couple more pictures. Overall I think it’s a pretty cool place. It’s just hard to get a foot in the door with people that have really built something like that–so big and known and useful in it’s own way. Here’s to hoping that I’ll get to partner up with them in this venture: